New Mos Eisley

Finally…it’s over.

My hosting duties are done. Not that Survivor: Tatooine wasn’t fun, it’s just I’ll be glad to return to my daily life of sleeping in late, drinking too much and cussing out the help.

But while I was still on Tatooine seeing the old homestead, I also needed to swing down into Mos Eisley to get my final paycheck from the producer. Some tool named Mark Burnett I think.

The first thing I noticed when I got into town is how much the place has changed. I mean, look at it! What was once a sleepy, gritty town is now an over commercialized tourist trap.

Hmmmm….Dooku seems to be making a killing here too….

So I found this Burnett character’s office, and after waiting around for nearly three hours with nothing to do but look through five year old Better Blasters and Gaffi Sticks Magazines, I was allowed in to see him.

Right away I kinda got a bad feeling about the guy.

“Well Well, Mr Jawa Jude, nice to finally see you. I’d like to congratulate you on a fine job as host of my little Survivor show. The ratings were fantastic. Here’s your check.”

“What’s with all the extraneous merchandising? The place looks like a carnival out there.”

“No, it’s an amusement park; it’s opening up next week,” he told me with a greasy smile. “And sales of Jawa Juice are going through the roof.”

Not to mention all the little gifts and stuff for the kids. Like this Survivor: Tatooine winner costume. Boy, the kids are eating it up.

“Yeah, yeah, that’s great. So where’s my cut in all this?”
”Oh…well…dear oh dear. Well, you see you signed on just to be the host. There’s nothing in the contract stipulating that you get any other money resulting from over blatant profiteering on your good name. eh…sorry.”

I looked at my check and it would hardly pay the rent. Great. Screwed again.

I didn’t know if I should tear this guy a new one or be flat out in awe of his business technique. I opted to find the nearest cantina and get drunk.

(Thanks to Becks for the assist on the pictures.)