Thursday, June 23, 2005

I Hate Public Innergalactic Transportaion


...And here's the reason why. Inevitably I always get stuck next to someone who gets sick. It never fails. Case in point. I finaly get off that poor excuse of a planet, Tatooine, only to have to spend the next 8 hours next to some supposed Jedi who constantly made strange gurgling noises and kept distorting his face in a very diquieting way. I made the mistake of asking how he was doing. He glowered at me and said, "Dude...I think I ate a rancid chili dog before I came aboard."

I began to edge away.

"It's cramping me up inside something fierce, dog."

Eyeing an emply seat, I made my move to slip away.

"Dude, you got any Malox? You must have some, don't you?" When I shook my head no, he grabbed me by the cowl and edged in so close, I thought I heard the dog begin to bark. "Man, why are you a hater? This is all Obi Wan's fault! He dared me to eat it. He said I could never eat as much as him. But I showed him. You know... in many ways... I'm better than him...but he keeps holding me back... Says I'm not ready for the chili-dog eating contest. Well, I showed him....urp...oh god...where's the bag...?"

Just at that moment, the announcement came...
"We will be jumping into hyper-space on our non-stop flight to Coruscant any minute now. Please fasten you safety belts as there will be a fue minutes of weightlessness. Thank you."

...never again...


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